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Hannah: Welcome to Happily Ever After the podcast, which seems to talk about all sorts of different things. But one listener described it as the place where we talk about what everyone else is thinking, but maybe not saying out loud. I am your host, Hannah Harvey. I'm a writer and a parenting blogger at Mums Days dot com that's m u m s d a y s dot com. If you wouldn't mind subscribing and leaving a review, that would be amazing because it basically means more people can find the podcast. And I also would really, really, really love to hear from you. So please could you contact me through Instagram @Mumsdays? You can message me anything really, but you know your stories of life and heartbreak or any thoughts you might have on the episode or any questions you want answering. And as always, you can find the details from this episode in the show notes.
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Hannah: Hello and welcome to Happily Ever After with me, Hannah. Now, I'm not sure I've mentioned this (totally joking), but these past two years I've been going through a divorce, and part of this involve me doing lots of things. Basically, anything I could think of that would make me feel better and help me get my confidence back. And one of the things that I did that I say Hand on Heart had the biggest impact involves my guest today. So I'm thrilled to say that today I'm interviewing the multitalented Katie Portman. She is an award winning blogger. She's an author, a public speaker and a personal stylist. Hi, Katie.
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Katie: Hello. How are you doing?
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Hannah: I'm very well. Thank you so much for coming on.
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Katie: Pleasure. Always a pleasure.
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Hannah: Oh, now, we've known each other for years and years and years because we used to blog together. But we reconnected this June through your personal stylist business. Because I really just wanted some help with my wardrobe. But I wasn't prepared for how much of a profound experience it was going to be. So something that started off feeling maybe a bit frivolous literally blew my mind. So how did you get into it, Katie?
00:02:22 - 00:03:55
Katie: Wow. I'm so pleased you've said that, by the way. So I got into it really because of COVID. It was one of those situations. So like many people, COVID came along. My writing work dried up super, super fast. Like I'm talking within seven or eight weeks. I went from being really busy to practically having hardly any work whatsoever. And I had the awful feeling of, Oh my gosh, I'm not going to earn any money. I really need to have a backup plan. So I did that kind of, you know, had some time to think about what I could do as a viable business and about, I think it's about five years ago now. I had my colors done through my blog. So a stylist got in touch with me and said, 'will you come along and have color analysis' and an exchange will you just write about it on your blog? And I went, you know, I went along quite skeptical, but interested, and the whole experience just blew my mind. And then from that, I also had a styling session. So when I was thinking, What can I do with the career? I realized that some of the things that I absolutely loved. So helping women style, I realize I've always been fascinated, not so much by fashion, if that makes sense, but by individual style. You know what makes a woman stylish? Why do we look at some women who just look so amazing and they just have that kind of innate sense of style? So yeah, so COVID happened and I thought, I'm going to train, as you do, to be a personal stylist. And that's what I do do.
00:03:56 - 00:04:24
Hannah: As you do. I love that you basically had the experience. I did. So when we you know, you come along and you get your colors done, you know, when I talk to other people about it, they're like, what are you even talking about? But it was literally like, you're connecting with something that you didn't even know existed. And it's this color that resonates with you and makes you look better. And it's lovely to know that that's how you got into it. It was through that experience of finding your color palette.
00:04:24 - 00:05:04
Katie: Yeah, I mean, absolutely. And it's just, you know, as I said, I went along really skeptical. So I think I even said something which kind of is really embarrassing now, considering I do it for work. But I literally said to this stylist, you know, I'm sure I'm going to find this session really interesting, but I'll be honest, you'll probably never get me out of black because that's pretty much all I wore was black, maybe some gray little bit of white. Maybe an odd thing of color, but not much at all. And now I think since then, five years, I've probably worn black under my face maybe three times in five years. It just blew my mind.
00:05:04 - 00:05:36
Katie: And I was at that point, and this will probably resonate with quite a few people listening, I imagine, is that I had my second child, I was still breastfeeding. I think he was about seven or eight months old at the time, and I just completely lost my way style wise and I wasn't particularly upset about it or in a rush to get it back. But I knew that I'd completely just lost who I was. And having that color session, it just it was almost like the first step back to getting me back again, if that makes sense.
00:05:36 - 00:06:10
Hannah: Completely. That's exactly how I felt. So when I left your color session, I went home and instead of being like, Oh my God, I've got nothing. I felt liberated to get rid of things I didn't even like. And it opened my eyes to things that actually I did have that suited me. But I didn't realize. And it also felt like. A little bit of my personality came back because I was like, I love wearing bright colors. Like you will not see me now without a bright color on.
00:06:10 - 00:07:02
Katie: Amazing. I think it does. And it's it always surprises me with color. Like, I don't know if you possibly you might have had the same thoughts. But when I went along for my color analysis, even though I was skeptical, I was also a little bit nervous because in a really bizarre way, I thought I might find it very restrictive. So the wardrobe was only black in gray and an odd bit of color. But actually, I now feel like years later that it was it was I almost it's almost like somebody gives you a magic key to a special hidden away door, and you just discover this whole world of color. And then the colors that particularly suit you best and not just how you look, but who you are like energy wise as well. It just it honestly, now I do this for work as well. It just it continually just blows my mind how powerful it is.
00:07:02 - 00:07:23
Hannah: I love it. And when you said to me, because I'm a palette that can't wear black either, I was like, Holy shit, I can't believe it. And I was thinking I was pretty much wearing black when I came. But as soon as I tapped into realize that the energy of black saps the life out of me, I've been like, I will wear it. But it's always lower half.
00:07:23 - 00:08:55
Katie: Yeah. I think it's something to be. I mean, black can be beautiful. You know, we've all seen women in these gorgeous, chic black outfits. It can be very chic. It can be. It's very serious. It definitely can have its place. But what actually really surprised me when I first started doing this for work was when clients would get in touch with me months later and they would always say things like, you know, I'm getting more compliments, I'm loving wearing color, I'm finding shopping easier, which is all wonderful stuff. And I kind of expected those comments. But what I didn't expect was clients to say to me, I'm so much happier now I stopped wearing black all the time because I don't think people realize quite how powerful color is on our emotions, on our wellbeing, on our mental health. And black is a color which can just literally kind of dampen and kill your spirit. So if you're not in a good place, you know, so I never wear black if I'm feeling a bit wobbly, anxious, If I had an argument with somebody, if I'm tearful, if I'm just out of sorts, I would never wear it because I just know that it will just put me more into that space. So if I wear black, it's always a very conscious decision of I'm feeling pretty good today and it's normally when I want it to be quite serious as well, and that's when I might wear black. But again, it's predominantly lower half that I would wear it.
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Hannah: Yeah, so I've got lower half serious stuff on. I'm wearing black tights and black boots.
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Katie: Yeah. So perfect.
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Hannah: But bright color on top. Because I need to focus.
00:09:09 - 00:09:51
Katie: Yeah. And also to get that energy from colours. All colors have an energy around them, and all colors give us something. So they give the wearer something, but they also give the people in your presence something as well, which I don't think people realize. So color can also be a really, really good communication tool. So it's why MPs wear navy. They don't wear it just because they wear navy. Because Navy is a color of trust. Excellent communication, respect. So they're trying to get those feelings out from these people, all that kind of thing. So it's a really, really I mean it's just such a huge topic color.
00:09:51 - 00:11:19
Katie: And just one thing that I would add as well in terms of how powerful color is and this is something I never expected. So as a personal stylist, I work with women on their colors, on their body shapes and their style personalities, wardrobe, shopping, you name it, all that kind of stuff. And I always thought clients would probably some clients may get emotional when it comes to things like their body shape because we all, you know, as women, we can carry around lots of insecurities about our bodies. So I expected that. I also expected that I might go into somebody's wardrobe and there's emotional stuff in there, the skeletons in the closet. So I expected all of that. But actually, the time that my clients get the most emotional is when they have their colors done. I literally have women in tears, tears of joy and almost relief when they see themselves in their colors. It happened to me on Saturday. I had this beautiful client who came in and she just burst into tears at the end and she said, I just I don't know why I'm so emotional. And I think it's because women see themselves in a better way, in a way that they weren't expecting, and they're getting something from these colors and seeing themselves just look so good and so visible maybe it's it's really transformational stuff. And it's still as I say, it just it just blows my mind to how powerful is.
00:11:19 - 00:11:52
Hannah: Yeah. Now you're saying that it's just taking me back. And I think the thing that changes because you're when you're trying your colors, you're seeing one green versus another green, for example. And in one green you can literally see that looks terrible on me and I feel bad. And then you put your other green on and suddenly you're like, you feel beautiful. And I think that's the gift you're giving people is the ability to see themselves as the beautiful person that they are. And connecting your colors with that is that. I think that's where it is.
00:11:53 - 00:12:32
Katie: Yeah. You know, that actually makes me quite emotional that you just said that, because I think I think you're right. I think it's, you know, as women were all so hard on ourselves, you know, I really believe that we are kind of our own worst enemies in a way. We're so hard on ourselves in a way that we would never be hard on the people that we know and love and care about. And, you know, most women do have insecurities about how they look. And it's unsurprising, really, when we have all these messages just thrown at us continually from society, you know, and the media from being such a young age. So when women see themselves so differently, I feel it's always a privilege.
00:12:33 - 00:12:50
Hannah: I can imagine because I was going to ask you, like whether people have a similar reaction to me, and they obviously do, because, yeah, it is such an incredible. Um, like a just a menu, a full menu of things that you can put on and you know that you're going to look good in it. What a gift.
00:12:50 - 00:13:44
Katie: Yeah, it is a gift. And yeah, it's really funny, isn't it? Because exactly like you said, when you try talking about it to people, you get people going. You what, what on earth is like colour analysis, you've had your colours done well. What does that mean? And you know, people can be very dismissive about it. And I was you know, I was genuinely, really quite skeptical about it and thinking, yeah, well, you know, it might be quite interesting, but what is it going to do for me? And now I do this for work the deeper I go into color. The more I learn. So like, now what I'm realizing is apart from doing my job and helping women identify which colors suit them best in terms of their beauty, but also their energy. What I find is that now I can drape women, some women in their colors, and I can almost feel when their energy doesn't work with a color, even if it suits them physically. Does that make sense?
00:13:44 - 00:13:45
Hannah: Oo yeah.
00:13:45 - 00:14:04
Katie: Yeah, it's really strange. Sometimes I can put a colour drape on somebody and I'm like, Oh my gosh, this is just you. I can just feel it. Never mind. Like visually what it's doing to how you look, but just who you are. And other times I can put a color on somebody and I know it looks beautiful, but actually it's not quite right for them.
00:14:04 - 00:14:05
Hannah: Yeah.
00:14:05 - 00:14:30
Katie: So I always say to clients that, you know, you do with your color knowledge, whatever you feel is right. So if you're not drawn to certain colors within your palette, even if they look beautiful on you, there's a reason for that. And it's because for whatever reason, it's just not speaking to your soul or it's not giving you what you need. So it's that trust your instinct thing were drawn to colors for reasons.
00:14:30 - 00:14:50
Hannah: It's interesting you say that because two things on colors I've got something with if I put on a light pink. So not this. This is very bright pink. If I put on a light pink, I literally feel like I could be the first lady. It gives me that energy. Is that crazy?
00:14:50 - 00:15:34
Katie: Wow. It's not crazy. So I feel when I say I've always been drawn to red. I used to wear the wrong reds, but for some reason, from a very young age, I've always been drawn to red. And I stopped wearing red when I met my husband kind of early twenties, because for some reason at the time he just didn't like it. So I stupidly stopped wearing it. Weirdly, he loves it now. So make of that what you will. Very strange, but I just feel phenomenal when I wear red. I feel like I could conquer the world when I wear red. And yet there's other colors in my palette. Like certain greens, which I know look nice on me physically, but I'll just. I just don't feel them.
00:15:35 - 00:15:47
Hannah: Yeah. So I feel like that about a bright blue for some reason. It's like quite high up there in the ones that should suit me, but I just can't seem to connect with it. I don't know why.
00:15:47 - 00:16:25
Katie: So just trust that. So for whatever reason, it's just not working with. With your energy and who you are. It's not suiting your character or your personality or giving you something. Or maybe you feel it's taken away something. It's just honestly, I mean, I could talk about this for days on end. It is fascinating. And there's so many good books out there, by the way, on things like color psychology and learning about the history of color and how, you know, colors can mean different things in different cultures. But the color psychology side of things is fascinating. So it's maybe you need to look up...
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Hannah: Yeah, what's the blue.
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Katie: Yeah. Why is it not working for you? That blue?
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Hannah: Interesting. Now then, so I've called this episode Confidence at Christmas because obviously it's party season, first week of December. But the problem is, is this time of year can leave us feeling really not very confident in our clothes. And I guess I wanted to get your take on that because you're so good with like the body confidence thing. So like, do you have any top tips for kind of what are the best or the biggest impact you could do to kind of help you dress more confidently?
00:17:05 - 00:18:58
Katie: So I think the main thing, not just for this time of year, but for any time of year, I think, is to learn to dress in a way that pleases you. So I think as women, you know what, often taught consider everybody else's feelings, everybody else's needs. You know, we want to fit in. We want to help people, nurture people. And sometimes I think we just automatically shrink ourselves a little bit because we feel that we have to dress like our friends dress or, you know, depending on what work environment we're in, we have to fit in with our colleagues. And that's when women lose who they are and that's when they start to dress in a way which might look visually fine, but that just doesn't make them feel good. So particularly at a time of year when, you know, very shortly after Christmas, we all know as soon as it's New Year, we're just all going to be bombarded with diets and weight loss tips everywhere. You know, it's inevitable it will happen. And I think it's just about owning what you wear. And that takes some time. And it can even take some courage to wear what you want to wear. But I would say if you can do that, that's when everything else won't matter so much. So we've all had that experience of wearing something which looks fine but just doesn't feel right. You know, when you get dressed sometimes and you think, Oh, I just I'm just, you know, you might wriggle around in the outfit a little bit or you just feel a bit out of sorts when you go somewhere wearing something because maybe it's not what you would ordinarily wear. So it's very much about trusting your judgment and just wearing things that bring you joy and make you feel good.
00:18:59 - 00:19:45
Katie: So I often say to clients when I am when I do the school run, if I don't get at least one funny look that day, then I'm not doing my job properly. And I say that because, you know, I do get funny looks sometimes in the school, run some of the outfits that I wear. And years ago, I would have been like, Oh, my gosh, I won't wear that coat tomorrow. You know, I'll tone my makeup down. I'll I won't wear a high heeled boots or something like that. Whereas now, actually, I know that if I do get funny looks, it's because I'm wearing something which is out of the ordinary. But I don't care because it's what I want to wear and it makes me feel good having the courage to dress in a way that pleases you and not try to worry too much about what everybody else thinks.
00:19:46 - 00:19:57
Hannah: That's really good, because when we did my colors, we also did my kind of what you call it, the style assessment, where you work out what your personality is.
00:19:57 - 00:20:32
Katie: Yeah. So yeah, so the style assessment covers like the two remaining pillars of great style. So we obviously look at body shape, which is really helpful. And also we, I helped you discover your style personality and to me that's probably as critical as the color because when you have an understanding of what your style personality is, it just everything makes sense. And it's almost like I feel when you understand your style personality, it's like somebody giving you permission just to be who you are.
00:20:32 - 00:21:07
Hannah: I was going to say, that's exactly what happened. Like, I am naturally a little bit of a show off and I've always been like, Oh God, I need to keep that under wraps because that's the thing that you maybe get told off as a kid or like, stop being a show off stop doing this, but I do want like, I think I was dramatic combination of dramatic and the more comfortable stuff. So that's where the color comes in. And it gave me permission to be like, Oh no, you need to be wearing this many things. And that all help bring out your personality.
00:21:07 - 00:22:51
Katie: Yeah. And it's just it's just so that you feel at your best, but also at your most authentic. So again, what we wear communicates messages to people. So there's no point communicating messages to people which are not authentic with who you are, because that's when people begin to think, actually, who is this person? Because she dresses this way. But then I speak to her and she comes out completely differently. So when we dress as ourselves in an authentic way, that's when we 1. feel just at our best. And that's our happiest and most confident. But it just everything just makes sense and it becomes easier. We're not trying to dress like anybody else. So for me, for instance, when I was a trainee journalist, I can quite clearly see that I dressed very classically and at the time it was all about the French women dress the best. There was lots of Paris style books out at the time and I loved it and I love classic style on other people. Whenever I dress for work, I'm sure I looked absolutely fine, but I never, ever felt my best. And then I would go out at the weekend and the classic things would disappear and I'd be there in sequins and killer high heels and something sassy. And that's when I felt my best. But I never understood why I wasn't feeling my best in the classic pieces. And it was just because my personality is not a classic personality. That's just not who I am. Yes, it's really, really powerful stuff. I just think. Dressing authentically, dressing in a way that pleases you. That's what it's all about. Yeah.
00:22:51 - 00:23:02
Hannah: So the next question I had was from a listener who was wanting to know what your tips were for dressing as a plus sized woman. And I guess it feeds into what you're saying there.
00:23:02 - 00:24:48
Katie: It does? Yeah. Very much so. So I see lots of plus size clients and actually see lots of women just generally who do this, and they hide themselves. So they hide themselves by wearing black. So lots of women wear black because they think it's the most slimming color. It's the chic color. Well, actually, no, it's not. Black is a perfect color to hide behind if you want to. So if you want to be invisible, wear black. Actually, it really doesn't do much for most of us. So they will hide themselves in black or they will hide themselves wearing baggy clothes. Lots of women I know nearly every client I've seen, to be honest, with conscious of their tummies. Every woman thinks they've got a huge tummy and they have to cover it up. So they pull the tops down over it, which then draws more attention to that tummy and that kind of thing. So it is about, again, dressing authentically and particularly for plus sized women who perhaps feel that they for some reason have to hide themselves or cover up a bit more. I would say try not to do that. And I would say that for every woman, try and embrace your shape. So I really think that all women, we are all sometimes caught up far too much in what size we are when actually that's not important at all. What's important is having an understanding of your shape. Hmm. So. And learning to dress for your shape. So I always say, forget about size. Don't worry about size. Consider your shape and draw attention to the bits that you love. And don't worry about the other bits.
00:24:48 - 00:24:54
Hannah: It's like the magician's trick of like attention. Draw attention to the things you want to see in a way from the stuff you don't.
00:24:55 - 00:25:58
Katie: Yeah, absolutely. And you know, some days you might just be absolutely loving every part of yourself. And hopefully that happens more often than not, and you just happy to go for it. But there might be other days that you're feeling a bit conscious of your tummy, you know, you might feel bloated, whatever. Well, just try and forget about that area and draw attention elsewhere. So if you've got you know, if you love your neck, wear a fantastic necklace or a really interesting collar. Yeah. If you make it look particularly good one day, then wear eye catching earrings, for instance, draw attention up there, that kind of thing. You've got fantastic legs. Show them off. And honestly, I have some Plus-size clients who got into that habit of hiding and I guess withdrawing a little bit. And then when I see them six months, 12 months later, after coming to see me for a styling session, they just look phenomenal because they're there back in the room. Yeah. And given that permission to just be themselves again and just show the world who they are, it's yeah, it's really powerful.
00:25:58 - 00:26:07
Hannah: Yeah, that really is. If you've got somebody coming in and they're literally hiding away, and then the next time you see them, they're like. I'm back. That's such a gift.
00:26:08 - 00:26:45
Katie: And it's about that thing of in terms of like body our bodies. It's about shape. It's always about shape. It's whether you're a size six or you're a size 28. It's still about your shape. Hmm. And learning just kind of having an understanding of what generally is going to work well for your shape and what's not. Because we're all different and what looks wonderful on one woman won't look so good on another woman. You know, she'll look better in something else. Yeah. For everybody. When they have an understanding of their shape and their style personality, it just. It just all comes together.
00:26:46 - 00:27:14
Hannah: Yeah. So as an example, we worked out that I was a pear shape, which means you want to draw your attention to the waist and wear kind of more stuff on top to kind of draw the eye up and away from my hips, which was really helpful because I had a couple of pairs of jeans where I was like, I love them, but why aren't they working? And it's because all the attention was at the pear level, if that makes sense.
00:27:14 - 00:27:18
Katie: Yeah. Which that's absolutely fine. You know, there's nothing wrong with that. Is that at all.
00:27:18 - 00:27:19
Hannah: No
00:27:19 - 00:27:49
Katie: When you feel that there's a sense of disproportion and we all have that, You know, we can all look at something that's not quite right about this outfit and what is it? And it's usually there's a sense of disproportion. So by knowing your shape and understanding it, that's when you go, Oh, okay. So because I am slightly curvier on the bottom half to create a better sense of proportion, I just can go wild on my top half and keep my bottom. Yeah, that kind of thing.
00:27:49 - 00:28:05
Hannah: Yeah, exactly. So, and yeah, like we were saying, just having that information at my fingertips is just allowed me to be so much more. Just confident, but also daring in what I wear. Like I'm less apologetic. I'll just be like, Yeah, this is just who I am.
00:28:06 - 00:28:48
Katie: I love that Hannah. I love that so much because that's what it's all about, isn't it? Yeah, that's what it's all about. And that's what great personal style is all about. So the women that, you know, wherever they are, whether they're a celebrity or a school mum or, you know, somebody who you work with, the women who have great personal style, it's not that they have more money to spend. It's not that they've been kitted out by a stylist. It's because they have an awareness of what suits them and more importantly, who they are and the fact that they dress with confidence because of those things. Yeah. Yeah. And that's what it's all about, just about being yourself.
00:28:48 - 00:28:55
Hannah: So if you were going to do one thing to improve my wardrobe, your wardrobe today, what would it be?
00:28:56 - 00:29:04
Katie: Oh, okay. That's a good question. So are we talking about actual physical wardrobe or are we talking about style in general?
00:29:05 - 00:29:16
Hannah: I guess if you work because you do wardrobe edits, don't you? If you go to someone's house and you are looking in their wardrobe. Like if you could do just one thing in their wardrobe, what would it be?
00:29:17 - 00:30:19
Katie: That's really easy. Have a clear out. A clear out. So most women, not all, because some women are very good and they'll have a really small capsule wardrobe. But most women have bulging wardrobes, but they have nothing to wear. Yeah. And the reason is when you have a bulging wardrobe and I love a bulging wardrobe. I love I love clothes. I cannot do a small capsule wardrobe at all. But the problem is, when you have a bulging wardrobe of stuff, you can't see what you actually have that you love, what you love, and what works for you, if that makes sense. So lots of women will do a lot of shopping, but they don't play around enough too with what they already own. So I would say there's one thing you can do. Be strict and whittle down your wardrobe. Get really strict. Everything in your wardrobe should own its place, should own its place. If it's not own in its place, it shouldn't be there.
00:30:19 - 00:30:27
Hannah: I read on one of your Instagram posts about each item of clothing should be worn. Was it 30 times or something?
00:30:27 - 00:30:46
Katie: Yeah, at least. So before you buy anything. You know, ideally you should be looking at it thinking, can I will I wear this 30 times now? Obviously, there is some things like a wedding dress or a special occasion dress that you probably are not going to wear 30 times.
00:30:46 - 00:30:48
Hannah: Have you not worn your wedding dress 30 times?!
00:30:49 - 00:31:59
Katie: No, I don't fit in my wedding dress anymore. I did try that a few years ago and I was like, oh my gosh, no, it's in it's box hidden away. But that is going to be obviously the exception to the rule. But pretty much everything else you should be looking at looking at that thinking, will I wear it at least 30 times? Hmm. Clothing is expensive. It's expensive. And, you know, whether you're buying a £5 top or a £500 top, you know, the fact is it's still money that you've earned, that you could be investing in other areas of your life and you're putting it into your wardrobe. So, you know, when I look at something, I'm always thinking, will I wear it 30 times? Will I wear it in two years time? Could I maybe see myself in it in ten years time, 20 years time? If not, could I pass it on to my daughter? Maybe or to one of my nieces. So I'm always thinking, actually, does it really own its place here? And then I think, Do I need it? So is there an essential that I'm missing? Do I desperately need a new pair of jeans? Do I need a different kind of coat? Or if I don't need it, do I Absolutely love it. Can't live without it. Won't stop thinking about it.
00:31:59 - 00:32:00
Hannah: Interesting
00:32:01 - 00:32:10
Katie: So it will do. Oh, it's okay. I just fancy having a splurge. Yeah, it's quite nice. Those pieces. They're not the ones that we want.
00:32:10 - 00:32:21
Hannah: Oh, I was literally about to move on to. What's your money saving tips for a wardrobe edit And that's basically it, isn't it? You need that checklist every time you buy something you do.
00:32:22 - 00:33:44
Katie: It's really hard, isn't it? Because sometimes you just want to splurge. Yeah, you just want to treat yourself for whatever reason. And I think it's women. I think men and their men have a very different relationship with their wardrobes and their clothes than what women do. And with women, we have so much emotions tied up with what we wear and what we own and how we dress on a particular day. And, you know, it is just about trying to be a bit not stricter, but just more mindful, more mindful in how you shop and also having high standards for yourself in terms of, you know, you deserve to dress in a way that makes you feel amazing. And if you're picking up a top from wherever it is, you know, whether it's 50p or £300. If it doesn't feel right, if you don't really love it, if it doesn't suit you, then really you shouldn't be buying it because you'll never wear it or you won't wear it enough. And if and if you do wear it, you're not going to feel amazing in it. So it's just it hasn't done what you need it to. Mm hmm. So it's about being much more mindful and we should all be doing this anyway. In terms of the planet. Yeah. You know, this constant fast fashion thing, this approach that's been around for years, which I think thankfully, is now beginning to wane, you know? So there's this huge pre-loved.
00:33:44 - 00:33:46
Hannah: Yeah, I'm just getting into.
00:33:48 - 00:33:49
Katie: It's so good. So lots of people, you know, eBay, vinted.
00:33:51 - 00:34:04
Hannah: I just bought a pair of Louboutins second hand. So I think they're originally £800. Wow. They've only been worn a few times. They're beautiful. And I got them for 100 quid.
00:34:05 - 00:36:35
Katie: See, I mean, it's just. It's insane, isn't it? Like it's. That's exactly what we should all be doing. So, you know, what I would say is, if you're going to whittle down your wardrobe and if you've got pieces in there that you no longer wear that no longer fit you, that you don't love. But they're you know, they're in reasonable shape, or particularly if they're from like a good brand high street or otherwise, you know, consider selling them and then reinvest that money into pieces that you do love that do you will wear. So it's just about being much more mindful. And what I would say as well is just. I think I've said this already, but we women will shop a lot, but they don't play around with what they already have. So what I used to do, and I don't know if you've ever done this Hannah, but I would buy something and think, Well, I love this jumper and then I get it at home and I'd put it in the wardrobe. It would still have its tags on and then it would live there with its tags on for months and months, because in the morning I'd be in a rush, getting the kids ready for school, getting ready for work. I'd open up the wardrobe doors and I'd just go for my old faithfuls again. Yeah, and again, if actually that jumper I've not tried on with the pieces that I own at home. Mm hmm. And in the morning, my headspace isn't there to do it. So when you buy anything new, when you know that you're going to keep it, first of all, get the tags off, because otherwise it's just going to feel new and like, foreign in your wardrobe. So cut the tags off. And if you can try it on with at least three items in your wardrobe. Does that make sense? Yeah. So when you come to a monday morning and you want to wear something different, you've already got some ideas in mind. So it's having the time to play around with the pieces that you already own and see what looks that you can come up with. And honestly, when I do wardrobe edits, it's astonishing how few pieces, how how little there is that is needed to make that wardrobe work. So women always think I'm going to go in and they're going to be left with hardly any clothes, and then they're going to have a huge shopping list and usually three items that that person needs just so they can wear more of the wardrobe. They might be missing a belt, a good pair of jeans, you know, a jumper that they can layer or something like that. It's normally just a few pieces that they need, but they haven't realized because they've not taken the time to play around with what they already own. So less shopping, more playing.
00:36:35 - 00:36:36
Hannah: More playing!
00:36:36 - 00:37:04
Katie: When your child like, you know, play dress up. Yeah, they put all sorts on. You know, they just throw things on and they play around with it. Women will lose that sense of play. We start to panic about, I don't know who I am style wise, and they go on Instagram and I should have that because everybody's wearing that item. And it's not about that. It's about being yourself, but also just experimenting, trying on different things. How can you wear things differently?
00:37:04 - 00:37:15
Hannah: Yeah, that is one of my favorite things to do. If I'm in the mood, obviously I have to be in the mood and have energy, but if I don't have the kids, I'll go and just try a whole bunch of my clothes on.
00:37:15 - 00:37:18
Katie: I love that. That's very rare. That's very rare. Very, very rare.
00:37:19 - 00:37:22
Hannah: Just to see what I still like and what I can maybe put together.
00:37:23 - 00:37:45
Katie: That's how it should be. And I know it's difficult because as women were generally really time poor. Yeah. And we're always at the bottom of the list and it's really difficult because actually, you know, the thought of giving up two or 3 hours of just playing around with items in your wardrobe seems a bit frivolous maybe, but actually it will save you time and money. In the long run.
00:37:45 - 00:37:57
Hannah: Yeah. One of my most popular reels this year. I literally it's like a sped up version of me trying on some clothes and I was just like, What do you do when you don't have your kids? And loads of people were like, well not that.
00:38:00 - 00:38:58
Katie: As I said, That is so rare. It is so rare. But honestly, if you can do that, exactly what you do, you know, even if it's just so I give myself a wardrobe edit at least twice a year. That's because I have one small wardrobe, which pains me, but that's what I have. So I have to move. I know it's so sad, first world problems. But I have to move my, like, spring-summer pieces out for autumn and winter and vice versa. So whenever I do that, I have a cull, I have a wardrobe edit, and then I do give myself at least an hour of, okay, I love this skirt but I've only worn it a few times. What else can I wear it with? Yeah, I take photos of the outfits because again, if you're not careful, you'll forget. Mm hmm. Yeah. So play around with wardrobe more. It's just. It's the key. And that's what I do with the wardrobe edit. So it's not just going in, helping them sort through things. It's very much we're going to start things, but actually let's play around with what you have and see what you can pull together.
00:38:59 - 00:39:01
Hannah: Mix and match like you would with your Barbies.
00:39:02 - 00:39:35
Katie: Absolutely. Just like and it's meant to be. Style is meant to be fun. It's not meant to be something to get worried about or, you know, fretful about. But women really do. And it's often because of their bulging wardrobes. No idea what to wear, not sure who I am. So they're trying to dress in certain ways for different people, different occasions, you know, and then you throw in all body insecurities and everything else. And it's no wonder that, you know, we can feel like that sometimes.
00:39:35 - 00:39:50
Hannah: Oh, Katie, this has been amazing. I wanted to end on what would be your, I guess, the final thought just for Christmas, because it is for feeling your best this Christmas.
00:39:50 - 00:40:03
Katie: So feeling your best this Christmas, I would just say again, dress for yourself. But also Christmas is that time of year, it is probably the only time of year when we're really encouraged to party.
00:40:03 - 00:40:03
Katie: Partayy
00:40:03 - 00:40:39
Katie: And embrace the sparkle. So if that's your thing and it most definitely is mine, then I would say, you know, just go for it. Don't be too timid here with Christmas. Yeah, if you love a Christmas jumper and like that kind of Christmas tree earrings, go for it. If you love sequins like I do, like knock yourself out. Like now is the time to wear. So what I would say it's Christmas. Don't be timid. Embrace it. Like take it as far as you want to and just have fun with it. It's. It's what it's meant to be all about, isn't it? Really?
00:40:39 - 00:40:46
Hannah: I think it is the time of year when you can literally get away with wearing anything you can.
00:40:46 - 00:41:07
Katie: And also it's the time of year that really we shouldn't be worrying about our bodies or how we look. We should just be eating lovely food, drinking lovely drinks, getting into that gorgeous Christmas spirit and just like you say, just wearing whatever you want, but really going for it at the same time.
00:41:07 - 00:41:08
Hannah: You heard it here first.
00:41:09 - 00:41:12
Katie: Sequin all the way for me. I don't know about you.
00:41:12 - 00:41:15
Hannah: Jingle all the way. That's me.
00:41:17 - 00:41:18
Hannah: Thank you so much, Katie.
00:41:19 - 00:41:21
Katie: It's been a pleasure. No, thank you. I've loved it. Really loved it.
00:41:21 - 00:41:24
Hannah: Me too, speak soon.
00:41:24 - 00:42:06
Hannah: All right. Thank you so much for listening. And have a great week. And I'll see you next time for another episode of Happily Ever After With me, Hannah Harvey. I would be very grateful if you wouldn't mind leaving a review or subscribing because this helps more people find this podcast. And of course, if you've got a friend who you think might enjoy this episode, please do recommend it to them as well. For anything else, your thoughts on the episode or any questions? Please do get in touch with me through Instagram @Mumsdays or you can email me Hannah at Mum's days dot com and I genuinely love hearing from you, so please do get in touch. Byee
